They call it, Charlie!

Man oh man, there is nothing like a train wreck! I watched the Charlie Sheen 20/20 interview like I was seeing Star Wars for the first time.  A freakin' moth to a light! I found myself grinning from ear to ear and then occasionally the mouth was agape. I mean really who gives a shit, but yet I really do. I really do. If he's willing to take us along, hell yea. I already have my seatbelt strapped on and adjusted for the thrill ride. The interview had this sort of feel like the footage of the alien cult people who put on Nikes and drank the potion. I was fully prepared to open the paper the next day and find that Sheen had off'd everyone in the house and then himself. I feel sorry for "his" kids, you have too. I think they are young enough to get some new down to earth dad (say, an architect) and live happily on Charlie's nickel. You know the old saying, you gotta have a license to drive.....but any SOB can be a father.
I want the name of the people who administered the "drug test" he took so that in the future if I need a job after a crack binge I still have a chance at bagging the gig. Most important is that Sheen has made a gajillion dollars off of a terrible, unfunny, and totally lame sitcom. He is probably flipping out because he has lost all hope in the world and thinks we are doomed anyway. He's lost all hope in mankind cause he reads the scripts before almost anyone. He's thinking (and rightfully so) when a show like "Two and Half Men" can be number #1 for so long and make so much money, why is the mother ship landing and taking us away such a weird concept. Drink up?

Ricki for Mayor!

I have a suggestion for the Dallas Police department and the city purse strings (the Man). If you guys really wanna make some money stop waiting around to catch speeders and drunks. You need to turn your focus on people who ignore cross walks. If the possible deadly outcome wasn't so real, it would be comical. You know what, it's comical period. It must be less than five percent of all people who actually stop or even slow down for cross walk users. I was watching one of those cross walks where there are flashing yellow lights and a big yellow sign that says' "state law to stop when crosswalk is occupied" and wouldn't you guess, those are ignored just as bad, if not worse. It's no wonder there are red ozone days and the earth's melting...it just sucks for people who try and walk somewhere! I'd put bike riders in there, but the whole bike shorts thing, I just can't. Maybe you like walking but aren't a fan of the maiming or the death an the oi! part that can so often go with a quick step across a Dallas street. I believe they could single handedly throw the city coffer into the black with a couple of afternoons monitoring a few crosswalks. Or just do away with them so we don't give anyone the false sense that they are at a safe place. Now, you kids get off my lawn!

Nighty night

I am experimenting with sleep deprivation and not by choice. I am not sure how weird it can get but it's fairly strange already. I have had back to back shows and can't seem to sleep past 7:20 (in the morning).
I want to, I really do. I want to so bad I get angry and that is certainly not conducive to sleep. It's not like you make fun of someone or insult them to lull them to sleep. Different people need different amounts of sleep to function properly. I think I am a, at least, seven hour guy. Wait a sec, blogging about this is boring me so much that I am falling asleep now. Just....need....to..zzzzzzz  

A Case of the Mondays?

I was trying to figure out why I was so tired. Am I really getting that old to where I am tired for no particular reason? I'm only 30 ish. Than I thought a bit...I think I have slept 10 hours over the last 3 days and not to mention having a few soda pops from time to time. I so want to be a morning person, but I sing for living. I love the idea of the new day and the sparseness of people about. I like seeing the paper boy on the corner call out "morning gov'ner two pence for paper?" Then I stop at an outdoor cafe and have my croissant and sip my tea. Wait, I thought I as an english gentleman. Dammit. Anyway, I think the only way I am going to feel better is to have some fried beer. I'm no doctor, but it makes sense.

Hunger Stike

For as many restaurants as there are in Dallas...I find myself going to the same four places. I'm in this sort of bored with food rut. I know there is amazing stuff out there, but right now it doesn't interest me. Until there is a new food category like Mexitalgreekanese or Frenmericajasoul I just don't think there is much that can be done to impress me. I'm still eating, just uninspiredly. I'm not sure thats a word but that hasn't stopped me before. Something better change cause I am running out of Everlastinggobstoppers!  

How've You Been?

I was driving yesterday and thought I noticed a girl friend from years back in the car beside me. I was curious as to how time had treated her and we hadn't parted on bad terms, so maybe I would wish her well at the light up ahead. I wasn't positive it was her, but it was looking like it. She is in the lane next to me and she comes to the red light a bit ahead of me. I am thinking I will pull up and if it all seems right, say hi. You know, see if she is totally hot or has seven toothless kids climbing all over the backseat. As I approach the car door opens and she leans out and spits a big hawker on the ground beside her. And when I say spit, I mean a certain thickness was present. It was a bit horrifying on its own but knowing it was her added a little touch of special. I could have done the cool thing and slowed a bit, perhaps stopped just short so she couldn't see me. Whats the fun in that? I pulled right up next to her and made my presence known. It was a good call, she was mortified. Ahhh, life's little pleasures.

It's Not Polite to Stare?

So, I had a very uncomfortable moment yesterday at the taco place. I was standing in line, a long line as the pace is new and people are in the "it's new, whoopie!" stage. I am in line with my 3 year old in my arms. I look ahead and there is a little person in front of us. I used to say midget with no malicious intents but was told it was derogatory. Theres a 70 people in the place and of course I have to be put in the perfect storm situation. Anyway, there's a little person and this guy is super happy to be at this new taco place and he wants to let me know. He starts talking to me. Immediately my daughters eyes lock on this guy and I mean LOCK. It becomes even more comfortable than it was when it was just me and him. I'm six two, so I am already in the taller bracket. I'm leaning down like Santa Claus asking a child what he wants for Christmas. Now I have to come up with things to keep my daughter distracted and to break her bionic stare. Then, then, she says "look daddy, baby man". What do you do?! My heart sank and and my stomach knotted up. "He's funny" she says. I am coughing and laughing uncomfortably. The guy didn't comment, but heard it as clear as day. That could have been like the sixth time that day that guy has had a similar situation. Luckily the excitement of the new taco place had the little man distracted enough to not hear half of my daughter's observations. (Bill Cosby voice) Kids say the darndest things.